The Mindy Project is just going for it these first two episodes! First, a long-awaited proposal; next, a “wait she’s already super-pregnant?” birth.

I mostly loved this episode because it had everything that The Mindy Project does so well — fun office banter, multiple storylines that all bring us back to the central one, a lot of Morgan, a big dramatic run through New York (get off the subway tracks, Danny!), Chris Messina making me cry with a beautiful speech, and a happy ending. (I had a few quibbles though, of course.)

We open with them debating baby names, because of course Danny wants something historical and Mindy’s only solution is OJ. Mindy is ready for sexy time, but Danny is not feeling it because he’s acting dumb and doesn’t want to poke the baby. Danny, get it together, you’re a doctor for crying out loud!

Then, thank goodness we’re back in the office — I have missed you sweet Tamra. But first Jeremy is here, very purple, and I love how sad he’s become. He wants everyone to come meet his new girlfriend Whitney and sorry, I don’t care about this story line.

However, I am way into Mindy and Morgan hosting a booth at the Manhattan Fertility Expo promoting their new campaign to get girls in their 20s to freeze their eggs, “Later Baby!” They practice their pitch to Tamra and Mindy has to read “on fleek” from her notes and this is so real. (The Urban Dictionary for “on fleek” used to be very confusing—I totally guessed the first time I used it. And also I think no one says that anymore? I’m not cool enough to know.)

Tamra shows them an ad by the Deslaurier brothers promoting natural chidbirth and it’s funny and sad at the same time because it’s so real. My favorite parts:

• “Big fertility wants to change the way we make new life”
• Brendan walking under a branch that he has to move out of the way — what?
• Brooke Burke’s title is “Actress, Mother, Health Expert” and she’s swinging on a wooden swing
• “Masks? Really, doctors? What are you hiding? You know who else wears masks? ISIS!”

Stop, I’m really scared Paleo Birth is going to become a thing now! I’m with Mindy, who is not down for Paleo Birth, and wants to be so drugged up that when she wakes up, Donald Trump is starting his second term. Danny overhears and of course, THE TWO DOCTORS haven’t talked about their birth plan so they’re off to visit the luxury birthing suite Mindy reserved. The best thing about this place is that they put spa water in the IV and there’s a dad cave with a tequila list curated by Pitbull. Can I go just to hang out?

Danny is such a man about childbirth and thinks it’s beautiful and Mindy should want to be there. Hahahaha, okay, why don’t you try it? Then he goes to Brendan to ask for natural ways to induce child labor. I’ve just got to do some complaining here.

 I understand that this is not a job-focused comedy and I’m glad we’re not stuck in the minutia of the OBGYN world, but sometimes it drives me crazy when they’re all so dumb about OBGYN-related things! Why is Danny asking Brendan for ways to induce labor? A doctor would 100% know how to. For goodness sakes, I even know how to because I watched Season 8 of Friends when they tried to induce Rachel. And Mindy should have been able to spot what he’s doing on her own. No, stop it.

Okay, rant over, I am glad Danny went to Brendan because I love when Brendan suggests Danny pay it forward instead of paying for the book, Paleo Birth, by “initiating a conversation about race, taking in a homeless person for a week, or starting a critical mass bike ride for veganism.” Danny’s like, no thank you, and pays him instead.

Danny tries to induce Mindy and is the world’s worst sneaky planner because he leaves the book ON THE COUCH. They have a fight where Danny calls her a coward and I am so team Mindy here. Childbirth IS a horror movie where your vagina explodes a bloody little alien and Danny is being SO patriarchal about childbirth being a rite of passage and how she wants to sleep through her first big challenge of being a mom. BYE.

The next morning, Morgan and Mindy have a great little exchange and I love that these two have actually become very sweet friends: “I’m nervous but excited. What two things are you?” He encourages her to do what she wants and makes the best joke ever when he says, “this is America: we respect women here.” Feeling better, but oops there’s a contraction, they’re off to the expo with Tamra and Beverly.

On the subway (what a horrible idea, there is no 2 stop anywhere close to the Javits Center), Tamra refuses to give up her seat because her legs are tired from being tall and thin. She is every woman on the subway that I hate (but I love you, don’t worry!). Thankfully, the Deslaurier brothers are also on the train because Mindy starts to go into labor right as the train stops for someone filming a viral video on the tracks.

Back to the story line I forgot about, Danny’s with Jeremy for the girlfriend dinner, when Jeremy is quite sweet and helps Danny come to his senses. Mindy is just scared of labor! And pretending it’s not happening like when she stole all the oxy to get a Brazilian (real talk). Danny gets a text that Mindy’s in labor and runs off to find her. OMG THERE IS NEVER A REASON TO GET ON THE TRACKS, DANNY. But fine, you’re the sweetest.

Back in the train, Mindy asks for the best Beyoncé songs for her birthing playlist: “Drunk In Love” and “Irreplaceable.” Instead they sing “I’ve Been Working on the Railroad,” and Brendan is burning sage which is “better than an epidural.” LOL.

Danny arrives and makes me cry with the best speech to make Mindy feel better. He tells her she’s so much stronger than him and that she can do this because she’s a stone cold bitch. “You’re tougher than anyone I know. You’re even tougher than Ma.”  She decides she can do it, but thankfully we don’t have to watch it.

An instrumental version of “Halo” plays as we see the baby for the first time and he is HELLA CUTE. I’m in love with this mushy baby, whom they name Leo. She thinks that’s after Leonardo DiCaprio and he thinks it’s after Leonardo DaVinci. (Which reminds me of how my dog Ella is named after Ella Enchanted but my fiancé tells people she’s named after Ella Fitzgerald.)

Mindy: “I’m a Ma.”

Danny: “Yeah.”

Mindy: “I love you, Leo Castellano.”

The sweetest.

Some important weekly things:

*Feature image source: Originally seen on The AV Club; Beth Dubber/Hulu

Share This Post: