The Bachelor Recap: Aggressively Seeking Attention

Oh lord have mercy.

Well, we officially have our villain, Krystal, and so of course, she got 80% of the screen time in this week’s episode. Not only was she actually saying the same thing over and over in different ways, they kept playing the same clips over and over.

You really, really don’t have to beat us over the head with how insufferable she is, you guys. We got it two minutes in.

So let’s give them what they want and talk about Krystal EVEN MORE.

Here are the 10 Worst Things That Happened on The Bachelor: Episode 4

10. Arie helping the women climb over a tree stump was truly ridiculous. They aren’t that weak, dude.

9. Words that actually came out of Krystal’s mouth: “I’m not sure what I’m going to say, um, but whatever I do, I have a feeling it’s going to be perfect.”

8. LOL YOU GUYS, GLAM SHAMING. I cannot handle this after credits scene where Marikh says Chelsea glam shamed her, just like slut shaming and body shaming. It was maybe the best thing I’ve seen on this franchise in years.

7. Krystal says Arie is looking for a woman not a girl in reference to Bekah who is 100 times more mature than Krystal (yes, I know I didn’t love Bekah last week, but after some social media stalking, I’m super into her). Also, I hate that phrase.

6.  A lot was made of Arie putting his arm around Krystal in the hot tub, but for real, why is Arie such an asshole? I guess the guys often get touchy with the women in front of everyone? But this felt so intimate (and incredibly awkwardly executed).

5. Krystal’s hero worship of Arie is so gross. She is so proud of him for sending Lauren S. home, you guys! Ooh, he’s so strong for helping her climb a foot up! Yuck.

4. Man, you guys, the age thing with Bekah and Arie is hard! While I definitely think they should have had more women over 30 as options for Arie, I also don’t find age to always be a huge factor. I started dating my husband when I was 22 and he was 34 and I was battling the age question with him for YEARS. It was incredibly frustrating and I just knew we were both right! At the same time, he was probably correct that I needed to figure out how to make myself happy first. But our 12 year age gap never affects us now! So, anyway, it’s an incredibly difficult issue and I feel bad for both of them (except not Bekah because she is way too good for him).

3. In Krystal’s many meltdowns (or one played over and over), she says all the woman are aggressively seeking Arie’s attention and they’re all desperate. First of all, that’s kind of the point of this show. Second of all, no one seemed desperate or weird at all except for Krystal and her incessant whispering.

2. I about died when Caroline had to force Tia to stand up to go get confronted by Krystal for doing absolutely nothing offensive. Krystal is ridiculous to make this a thing and even more insane to play the victim to Arie who I swear is going to get VERY annoyed by this as soon as his penis gets over looking at her.

1. STOP WHISPERING TO ARIE, KRYSTAL! Can you imagine having a conversation with an adult who is not a cartoon character who whispers all the time? I don’t care how hot she is, Arie, send her home just for that!

And now my random thoughts/predictions:

  • He definitely doesn’t actually really like Seinne, right? He likes the idea of her (as do I!), but their date felt remarkably forced.
  • How amazing to have Seinne talking about the lack of representation of black women she grew up with!
  • God bless, Chelsea, who I genuinely loved this episode. “Freaking millennials these days. I guess I am one.” And her perfect Krystal impression!
  • Tia is amazing and I’m into her.
  • The age thing is definitely going to end things with Bekah and Arie and that’s pretty sad, but he’s definitely the type to want a sure thing more than a magical thing (plus they’d flame out pretty fast).

This week wasn’t as infuriating as last week (though pretty boring and repetitive)! I like a lot of the women! There’s hope for this season! See you next week.

XOXO,

@AliceMcAlex

*Feature image source: twiiter.com/BachelorABC

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