The Bachelor Recap: Only Here for Rachel


I really hate talking about women vs. other women, so clearly, this was the most annoying episode to watch/recap since the main focus was Corinne vs. Taylor.

I honestly don’t like how either of them handled themselves at all and I hated how much of the show it took up. The way the producers manipulated Corinne and Taylor to make them so mad at each other and to make “such great TV” by showing us a two hour long “catfight” is too much for me and not at all enjoyable.

Besides the 15 minutes or so we got with Rachel, this episode was a stupid waste.


Here are the 10 Worst Things That Happened on The Bachelor: Episode 5

10. Raven, who I still like, says that when her heart went pitter patter at Nick singing “Kiss the Girl,” she knew she fell in love with him. NO THAT ISN’T LOVE THAT IS LIKE CHILL OUT.

9. Corinne says “Make America Corinne Again” and like, I’m so at the point with Donald Trump that no reference to him is cute at all—you are the worst, no.

8. I hate this group date so much, I can’t even. Like, look, some of it would have scared me too, because loud noises and jumpy things are scary, but this is a silly tourist thing and them acting like they don’t realize that is so dumb. What a waste of my time.

7. Nick is so producer manipulated, it’s really starting to bother me. Or, he just really is doing this on his own to make his season dramatic and it’s so stupid. I like you, Nick, but this isn’t some stupid game. I mean, it is some stupid game, but enough is enough. Two to three episodes of manufactured drama is fine, but it’s time to stop acting a fool. The dumb rose ceremony order was absurd. No one was tense. Everyone knew what you were doing.

6. Taylor, girl, stop it. You don’t get a husband because you have a masters degree. Good for you! No, seriously, good for you! But stop being such a snob.

5. I have to think Nick is just playing along with Corinne because he likes making out with her and because he knows she’ll make good TV, but I literally can’t with him listening to Corinne’s insane speech about Taylor and saying she handled it maturely. Shut up.

4. You know who gets an opinion about something and then says it’s everyone’s opinion? Donald Trump, our new dictator. Oh, and Corinne. Corinne, if you have issues with Taylor, say so, but don’t make up some nonsense about all the girls thinking she’s there for the wrong reasons when you’re just pissed.

3. GIRL, if Corinne is emotionally manipulative then she clearly understands emotions and how to use them. So Taylor, stop talking about how dumb she is and how much better prepared you are for a relationship because you have a psychology degree. Corinne is the worst! But stop. Stop.

2. Corinne goes full on mean girl at Taylor in her in the moments and I’m over it. She basically acted how mean men love to say women act so they can feel better about being sexist.

1. Nick is concerned about being able to show the father of whoever he picks that he respects his daughter, which is a fine sentiment and all, but I need this show to stop perpetuating the idea that men need to ask permission of a women’s father. STOP ASKING PERMISSION. ASK FOR A BLESSING, FINE. ASK THE MOTHER TOO. Why on earth would the dad only get to decide? It ain’t 1838.

Nick was mostly very blah this episode, so we’re switching things up and talking about how awesome Rachel is instead.

Here are the 5 Best Things That Rachel Did on The Bachelor: Episode 5

5. Rachel can actually dance! Cutely! In front of people! And not make me feel awkward!

4. I love how frustrated Rachel is that she likes Nick, instead of being the “I love him already just like I knew I would” girl.

3. I love both how nervous Rachel gets because she likes Nick and how confident she is in herself and her relationship. No one is ever confident on this show (yes, people are cocky) and it is beautiful to watch.

2. Rachel is an amazing angel who can talk to Corinne and Taylor calmly and keep them calm and is compassionate to both of them, god bless her.

1. I think what happened at the beginning when Rachel says she’s not there for girl chat was that Sarah started talking about Corinne and Rachel was like, “Oh hell no, I’m a grown woman, we’re not doing this.” Thank you, Rachel. Thank you.

Some random thought and predictions:

  • Last week, I had a new theory that Vanessa left and that’s why Nick was crying but this week, they showed her listening to his sad speech so MAYBE NOT. I have no idea what’s going to happen.  I guess I stand with my top three still? (Vanessa, Raven, Rachel.) But I don’t know.
  • I really, really want Rachel to be our Bachelorette but I also would be so happy if she won.
  • I feel like Brunette Danielle and Nick have no connection besides their make out connection. For real, do they say any real words to each other?
  • Why are there still so many random people here? Let’s speed this nonsense up.

Well, the trailer for next week was real manipulative and there’s no way it represents anything that actually happens. As long as it’s not Corinne vs. Taylor the whole time, I’m there. 



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