The Bachelor Recap: You’re My Person

Happy Bachelor finale!

That was, actually, a very dramatic finale, Chris Harrison. And it was as romantic and beautiful as it was frustrating and heartbreaking. Alas, isn’t that The Bachelor at it’s best?

Let’s get right into this.

Here are the 10 Worst Things That Happened on The Bachelor: Episode 11

10. Babe. BAAAABEEE.  BAAAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEE.

9. Ben whines to his parents that he never thought he’d put himself in this situation but oops, he has. You know, the situation where he’s made two women feel that he’s going to propose to them when, um, he definitely can’t propose to them both? Yeah, you didn’t just put yourself in that situation. You put three people in that situation and you are the one who is going to be the least hurt by the situation. Each of the women suffered more because you couldn’t control your selfish people-pleasing tendencies.

8. “Life’s not going to bring me two more better women,” says Ben. You hear that, men of the world? Life brings you women! That’s all women are made for, right? Making men happy! Thank god they’re all just waiting around so willingly to be given to boring men.

7. They hyped up this, “Ben’s getting married on the show tonight!” thing way too much for it to not happen. What a waste of all of our skepticism and disbelief! Poor Denny. Luckily, Ben saved the day for them with that most adorable second proposal (which we will get to shortly in our BEST THINGS THAT HAPPENED section).

6. Ben is making Lauren feel so insecure because she’s too good? Does the struggle ever end?

5. “Don’t roll your eyes,” Ben tells JoJo while he’s being the most frustrating. Girl, ROLL YOUR EYES.

4. Lauren’s dad says there’s nothing more that a dad wants for his daughter than for her to find the man of her dreams. Like, nah. Yeah, finding love is one of the best (if not the best) priorities, but nah. Wish for her to be fulfilled and happy and able to find joy in herself.

3. JoJo: “But you love her too. Am I right?” Ben: “Yes.” GOD- a punch to the heart that was, right? Poor JoJo.

2. Oh my gosh I couldn’t stand watching JoJo give her love speech to Ben and watching him dump her. She was trying to run away so hard and he kept death-gripping her hands and not letting her free. Broke my poor heart.

1.Thank god Ben theoretically doesn’t have to dump anyone else because he is maybe the worst at it in the whole world. Seriously dude, don’t tell someone that you love them and they’re your best friend AS YOU DUMP THEM. It doesn’t matter if you feel that way- this isn’t about how you feel. This is about being as kind as possible to someone you supposedly care about! She spent months obsessing over what went wrong because you dumped her so poorly, leaving her stuck inside her head. You don’t have to be the good guy all the time- in fact you AREN’T the good guy right now. Just be okay with that.

In the most important news, PRAISE that JoJo is the Bachelorette! She is going to be a great Bachelorette and I’m very into it. But how awkward to announce her with Ben there. She sat back down as far away from him as possible and I do not blame her.

ALSO did you know that Caila had already filmed stuff as the Bachelorette and found out Thursday night they changed their minds? Yikes.

And now, a new section of our recaps.

Here are the 5 Best Things That Happened on The Bachelor: Episode 11

5.Ben’s mom! Ben’s mom! She is the best. We basically need to have a reaction cam on her through every episode ever because she is not about to hide her feelings.

4. When Lauren says Ben is perfect, his mom says, “we’ll talk some more later.” Bless you.

3. It was very sweet of Ben to call Lauren’s dad! (I do wish it had been with both parents and less of a, “Can I have her hand in marriage [because it’s not her choice]?” and more of a, “Can I have your blessing?” but whatever.) That “WOOH!” Ben let out after he hung up with Lauren’s dad was the most adorable and I definitely swooned.

2. Lauren fixed Ben’s messed up suit jacket before he proposed again which was the most coupely cute thing ever.

1. This second proposal on After the Final Rose with all of the families melted my heart right there. It’s gone, it’s melted.

Enjoy your two month break from Bachelor land! I’ll miss you deeply. See you May 23 for the new season of The Bachelorette!

XOXO,

@AliceMcAlex

*Feature image source: Twitter.com/TheBachelor

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